Lessons from the Field
After the first of three days doing focus groups at a large K-12 independent school in the southeastern U.S., I am even more convinced that the marital or relationship metaphor fits what happens between parents and the schools they choose for their children. As in many relationships, parents first fall in love with the school and then begin wishing it were different. What once seemed overlookable becomes deal-breakers. And then they start trying to change the school. When their gentle efforts to promote change arer politely (or passively) refused by the school, some parents become more aggressive demanding that their wishes be accommodated. Finally, the relationship disintegrates entirely in a spasm of anger and vituperation.
Then, the cycle begins anew as the parents fall in love yet again with another school. I saw it countless times in my psychotherapy office and I am seeing it weekly in schools. Same game, different ballpark.